my mind?..

what i find
under a couch cushion
or behind a rock
or, in my pants pocket
in a constellation
in between the lines
or under the dirty laundry pile
in words not said
next to the milk
to the left of my last thought
somewhere before yesterday
under a leaf
peeking out of a smile
between 'oh' and 'well'
buried in the garden
under the shoots
behind the fridge
with mothballs and pennies

is never what i was looking for at the moment,
but usually something i was looking for before.

so

if i lose something else,
after i lost the first thing
shouldn't the first thing appear?